Sometimes She's Just Not That Into You

by Michael Webb, Founder -  

When women just aren’t in the mood to have sex, men sometimes take it too personally.  Unless she says to you, “I don’t want to have sex because I think you are a big, fat, noncontributing waste of my lifetime,” then go ahead and assume it’s because of you.  Outside of that, find out what it is that’s keeping her from wanting to get intimate.  For the most part, men are willing to have sex no matter how busy or over-worked they are.  In fact, men consider it to be a great stress reliever.  Women, however, cannot focus on the desire to have sex if their minds are being weighed down with the stresses of the day.  If you nuzzle up to her and stick your hand up her shirt, and she swats it away, don’t immediately react defensively.  Throwing a hissy fit because your girl won’t have sex with you never got anyone laid. 

A little bit of respect goes a long way.  If she is standoffish, find out what’s on her mind.  It’s good to open the door, as allowing her to vent the frustrations of the day to you allows her to relax and let it go.  Plus, you may find out that she is actually upset with you, and going into that conversation calm and collected will warrant a much more favorable response from her. 

Think of what you can do for her, rather than reacting to what she’s not doing for you.  As stated before, simply being a shoulder to cry on is enough.  Plus then you get that whole knight-in-shining-armor thing going on.  You could also offer to get her a bottle of her favorite wine so she can unwind with dinner (getting a chick tipsy always makes her want to have sex more, you know).  After dinner, rub her feet or her back.  When she’s physically and mentally relaxed, then you can start working your caresses up her leg or down her shirt.  It shows her you’re more concerned about including her in the sex, rather than using her to get yours. 

The best thing you can do in the face of rejection is to check your ego.  No issue was ever seen through with defensiveness.  If you badger her into sex, it won’t be satisfying for either of you, and you’ll face greater rejection later.  These sorts of bedroom issues can lead to larger problems.  It’s best to address them early.

About the author:

Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb is the founder of "", teaching men how to become exceptional lovers. Unfortunately most men have no idea how to make 'out-of-this-world' love, which leaves women frustrated and disappointed. Learn to be one of the rare men that can satisfy women both physically and emotionally by visiting:

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